So this morning she wanted to nurse right away. I could not distract her with oatmeal, cheerios, ANYTHING, so I gave in. Plus she's had a slight fever the past couple of days (I think due to teething) so I thought nursing might do her some good. I even bought her first bag of baby cookies in hopes that she'd like those over nursing. (they are whole grain animal crackers, so it's not like i'm giving her cookies loaded with sugar or chocolate). But no....she doesn't even like the cookies!!! Apparently she does not take after her daddy in regards to cookies. (When I told Orrin she didn't like them he goes "oh good, I'll eat them.)
For her morning nap, I held her until she fell asleep, then put her in her crib. I KNOW. I'm substituting one bad habit for another. I'm trying to keep in mind that the goal is for her to fall asleep on her own, in her crib.
But did I like holding her warm little body, rubbing her little back and watching her eyes get heavier and heavier? Absolutely. I took those few minutes to say a fervent prayer to God about her life and her future. If I had a dollar for every prayer I said for her throughout the day I'd be a millionaire.
And I'm justifying it in my head that "once she's weaned, she'll start to fall asleep on her own." *fingers crossed*
I guess the good thing is that even though I held her till she fell asleep, at least she didn't fall asleep while nursing.....right?!?!
OH....and last night.....she woke up at 11:30. Orrin went in and tried putting her back down. But she cried for about 15 minutes and finally I went in and nursed her back to sleep. Then she was awake again at 5.
It's amazing what can make you feel like you aren't doing a good job as a parent. I've talked to several moms who've said "yeah I lay my child down awake and they go right to sleep." Or "she shouldn't be waking up in the night at this age to nurse." UGH...man. It stings to think I've done something in the past 12 1/2 months that have led up to her sleep issues now.
So tomorrow is another day. I'm going to start letting her cry longer periods at night, all the while laying there praying she goes to sleep.
I know one person who'll be sleeping soundly thru everything (unless I wake him up!)....ORRIN. That guy doesn't wake up for anything!!!!
1 comment:
PLEASE keep in mind that they are only little once! There will come a day when you would do just about anything to rock her to sleep in your arms. I know it's something that has to be done, but don't for ONE SECOND think that you have done something wrong by cuddling too much. You are a WONDERFUL momma, and DON'T YOU FORGET IT! (Jumping down from my soapbox now.)
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